Paper Envy


Decided I would take myself to breakfast Saturday morning. Woke late(ish), and went to the gym, M was working so I had only myself to amuse. By the time I finished a good session at the gym, I was nearing lunch, but feeling like breakfast, so went to Coffee Club, which does all-day breakfast, then thought I would do some leisurely shopping afterward.

I had initally intended to read the paper whilst at the cafe, but when I arrived all the national papers were "out" at other tables and I wasn't as interested in the local paper as the World News. I did that hemming and hawing thing, thinking
"do I REALLY need a paper?"...
..."oh well I could play with my phone instead"
"don't be daft, you're not at a bar, sipping a vodka, waiting for a friend, you can't play with your phone while you eat"...
..."oh don't be such a ninny, just go and BUY a paper"
"oh but the newsagents is all the way over there"...
..."but then I'll lose my place in line"
In the end, I walked out of the line, and went and bought the Saturday edition of the SMH. If you're not a reader/buyer of the SMH Weekend edition, its a monster paper. So much so, it actually sits in two piles at the newsagents (and I almost walked out with only one section, I wonder how many people get ripped off without knowing what they're missing).

I got back to Coffee Club, ordered and sat down with my paper. I flicked through the sections, before deciding which to start with (Barack Obama piece), and set the rest of the paper down on the other side of the table. As I did this, it was lunch time pretty much (I did admit it was lateish) and there were increasingly more people taking seats and placing orders etc etc. As I read, I slowly realised that a LOT of the tables settling in were eyeing off my paper. One woman who was rifling through the stack near the counter, kept glancing at me, almost glaring!
Since I wasn't sporting a swastika or swear word on my t-shirt, or wearing hot pants and hooker heels, I can think of no other reason for her behaviour!
After that, I felt compelled to look up everytime I noticed someone near the newspapers, and they were always kind of looking my way, coveting my paper!
I felt like standing up and shouting "I PAID FOR THIS! IT'S MINE YOU BASTARDS!"

In the end I didn't, but I was terrified to move after that. I didn't want to leave my paper unattended, for fear someone would pounce on it, but I didn't want to take it with me to the counter, that would look ridiculous.
So where I would probably have ordered another coffee and continued to sit reading, I didn't, as CC only operate under "Order at Counter" not table service.

After I finished eating, I carefully packed up my paper, taking care to make it look neat, and tucked it under my arm, scurrying away out the side door, avoiding eye contact with anyone.

6 kindred spirits ~ This bugs them too!:

.:.:. Reanan .:.:. said...
May 26, 2008 9:00 PM

What the?

What strange, strange behaviour.
Almost shaming your paper hogging - except it was yours to begin with.

I've never had this happen to me, usually because I am with book most places so if I find my hands idle it's book time (it's book, it's book time!)

Perhaps Coffee Club papers need to come with small neon signs so they shame the real paper hogs?

.:.:. Reanan .:.:. said...
May 26, 2008 9:00 PM

ps; did you really write ninny on your blog? lol

Dataceptionist said...
May 27, 2008 11:56 AM

Yes exactly re.

And I was keen to catch up on world events on this day, rather than book as would be my normal routine.

Hahaha is there something amiss with "ninny"?

K said...
May 27, 2008 12:46 PM

Ninny is up there with irksome. I'm personally a fan of both.

I'd have left the paper ont he table with my bag or jumper on it, almost hoping that someone tried to take it so I could point out the theft and request my paper back. That'll serve them right.

Anonymous said...
May 27, 2008 1:14 PM

Yeah this has happening to me in Philly too, but in any case you'll just have to practise ignoring them with your self righteousness of paper purchasing. Or I tend to sit the paper with all my things on a chair or similar so people get the hint. Or think I'm going OTT on the paper theivery....

Dataceptionist said...
May 27, 2008 1:45 PM

I considered both these options K & Eca before rejected them into the "possibly I'm over-reacting" camp. Hahahaha and yes Eca I was also concerned about this frame of mind! Like, bug off everyone!

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